i am a burden for you...

everyone will definitely feel this at one point in their life.. 

be it money issues, health issues, self confidence issues, being closeted etc..

in a relationship,

when you are down with financial problems, you will feel that you are burdening your other half if he or she needs to fork out money to buy you dinner or lunch, take you on a holiday that he or she wants to go.. or just day to day daily expenses.. 

same as health conditions, you feel that you will kinda burden the other partner in a way where his or her life will be obstructed in a way that needs to accommodate yours...

if you dont have a bf yet, you will be determined not to start a relationship..

if you are dating, you will be determined not to go any deeper..

the thing is.. what if the other person really loves you?

when it comes to love, sometimes little things like these doesnt really matter..

yes you may say that when we are in love we dont really think straight(if you are gay youre not even straight in the first place)...

put that aside,

what if he is the one for you, and what if suddenly somehow that "burden" is somehow resolved and somehow you lose a chance to be with him... thats just ridiculously stupid isnt it?

try putting yourself in the other person's shoes and think..

what if you are the one who is dating a person who suddenly have a "burden" in his life...

what are you gonna do? how would you feel if he pushes you away...

what if he pushes you away without giving an explanation?

life is never like the movies where the main characters kinda reveal the "burden" or the burden was revealed by some friend and they both found out they love each other blablabla.... happily ever after... nah..

most of the time, those burden are kept secret and life goes on....

so ... all these burden, are them all yours to bear?

did you ask for it?

the answer is NO..

if there is someone that is willing to go through the path of difficulties with you with their level best with no regrets and complain, why not let them try... there wont be any harm to him or you...

yes some required a lil more sacrifice than the rest but.. thats just life...

nothing is easy in life..

you only live once...

grab the opportunity when it is presented to you...

to those who are still reading till now, I love you a lot.. and there are people out there that loves you to if you let them..

always remember, you are not a burden..

Easter update...

fuck this..

ive been thinking too much...

too much thinking but no action... i dont know la.. i dont know how am i feeling or what i am doing now..

things with little Tom is just, well, we are just "friends".. haha... Niey loves to tease me with that quote.. damn benci.. haha...

on a brighter note, i had a good week off in London and thanks to Bear for being such a good host and friend!!!

its the easter weekend and i have both Friday and Monday off. its two of the eight paid public holidays in the UK. yes, we have only 8 public holidays in the whole freaking year! unlike malaysia, they have like what, 30? 40? lol....

my current company's area manager asked me regarding my visa situation and asked me on what they need to do if they wanna hire me.. im just keeping my fingers crossed and i need to try to make things work with ...

hm...

i dont know la..

life is just quite simple, why am i complicating it further?

i think i stress for no apparent reason and my pimples are sprouting... lol.. the chinese say if you still have pimples means you are still young! -.-

young my ass i rather be old than to have any blemishes!! urgh!!!! ass!!

haha...

im playing Kelly Clarkson's playlist on skype for the past week now.. dont know la... all her songs seems so boomz.. even those that are not aired...

well i better get some sleep, new episode of Game of Thrones is out tomorrow! cant wait to see my favourite duo Arya and the Hound in action! 

oh yea, pics of guys i took in London, let me post them up! :)

i did put some of them on instagram but all thumbnails only! more to come! :)