t u l s

t u l s

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

warning: reminder to new bloggers...

so our good friend which is also a blogger's facebook has been infiltrated..

not like the hacked kinda infiltrate..

just that some smart ass decided to blow my friend's cover as *insert blogger name* on his wall..

what happen if you found out about that the instant you woke up from your bed?

well luckily for my friend he doesnt have a weak heart so he survived..

i think its cos he is young and cute so he didnt suffer any damage la..

some might wonder: what could happen to him!?!?!

well, first of all the post on his wall was not privatized so all his kawans boleh nampaks.. and his name was tagged in the process so any random friends of his or the person who posted that status is able to access his profile..

and being a gay the person that he is, he has has lots of gay friends without the knowledge of him as a gay blogger and with the efficient technology like facebook, now everyone knows..

well not everyone.. just those who saw la basically...

as the freaked out him at that moment he took it off his wall, untagged, and also remove that person from his friends list FOREVER!!!

i dont think he is gonna wanna suffer from another attack like that again..


lesson of the day : DONT SIMPLY ADD PEOPLE ON FACEBOOK, if you really did, whatever happens, you will have to BEAR THE CONSEQUENCES..

well some people might say: so what if he is found gay and a blogger?

well... nothing..

just that we blog with a different identity for a reason.. no one likes to be outed even though it is ok to do it...

even my loyal supporter with the fake name ooi2009 is an identity to be respected..


so reminder to all new bloggers out there! youre warned!! :) beware!!



Monday, January 30, 2012

grocery shopping is a form of exercise..

im not kidding de...

my arms grew twice the size since i got here! :) hahahaha...

i give you an example of when i first got here...

this two china dolls are so powerful carried like at least 4 kgs in each hand! hehe.. by the time they reach home the biceps triceps all will be tegap like malimo liao...

serious shit no kidding..

at first i was betting with my kawan saying that: wah, china girls beli so many stuffs, sure got car around one or got some rich ang mo bf... mana tau still carry like that and they walk like as though they are 50 years old even 50 years old ah mah walk faster than them..

poor bitches...

thats what happen to me when i first got here! hahahaha...

now i go grocery shopping with my travellers bag!! can fit 35 litres one... hahahaha... all the weight i distribute it over my shoulders! :)

sometimes if need to carry bags i will wear my grocery gloves to prevent suffocation of my fingers... plastics can make my jari biru if too heavy!! :)

things that i pick up along the way.. hahaha.. so now i go grocery shopping like macam hiking like that with all the gloves and the backpack.. lolllllllll...

and lastly i found something similar like the other day! hahahaha...

but this one is more delicious cos got the word DELICIOUS beside! :)

hihi... delicious spotted dick man!! muacks!! READY IN 2 MINUTES LMAO! hahahahahahaha


Sunday, January 29, 2012


was blog hopping and i stumbled upon this short post that gives a situation constantly faced by mostly everyone some point in their life..


the thing is its not like we dont wanna work hard or aim high.. its just that sometimes we really dont know what we really want in life..

what we wanna do when we grow up..??

sometimes what we want will not necessary be suitable for us... eg we wanna be singers or performers but we just dont have the talent..

sometimes we dont get what we want.. eg. we are singers but we are not popular kinda thing..

sometimes things that are suitable for us are just in front of us but we just cant see it..

sometimes it takes us a short span to really realize what we want in life...

sometimes it takes years.. eg you can see people like our dad's age in the same course as us in the uni, maybe he really felt passionate and finally found out what he wants to do in life.. maybe yes maybe not, we wouldnt know...??

sometimes it just never come.. who can we blame?

we blame the luck? pure bad luck?

we blame that person for just not working hard enough??

we blame ourselves for being too lazy?

sometimes in the streets we see beggers begging for money(those walking quite young ones)... now i start to think, do they really wanna be beggers? its not easy to beg for money from all the PBSM donation drives i attended... 

is it cos they are too stubborn to look for a job? were they provided with education when they are young?

what was the cause of the whole issue..??

........we will never know..

sometimes we feel like helping them, but how do we wanna help?

how long can we help them??

do they want our help..??


im thinking too much...

anyway i think im heading back to my real face+book-ing...

lastly, what if we really found out what we really want in life? what happens next? we aim for something else? :) be content of what you have...


Friday, January 27, 2012

cousin: condom and lube...

so this was a conversation with my cousin and i over whatsapp..

eh, guess what i found in your bag?

err... the one i gave you? (i gave him a bag that i once used but was too much to bring over to the UK)


erm..... money? condom? lubricant?

haha.. the last 2...

omgosh are you serious? kk.. just take it and use la... see expiry date first ok.. just experiment at home or something...

lol i threw it away already...


i was rushing to tuition and i found it in the car, i told my mum but she said face cream...

WTF your mum knows!!!!!!!????????????????????

er.. no la it was too dark in the car and i was rushing so nola she didnt...

gosh... gave me a heart attack...

hahahaha.. i needed the laugh!! thanks!!


that cousin is such a slut.. but whatever la.. but i really totally forgotten that the items were really in the bag and i was so shocked!! hahaha.. but irregardless... then continued..

eh... what did you do with it la???

erm... like everything?

kk... haahah...

so yea.. i was ok about it, just that its like so wtf kinda thing...

you encountered sorta similar situations before? lol


spotted cow i know la.. spotted dicks are only found in tesco.. they chopped the dick up and made into puddings! hehe...

Thursday, January 26, 2012

what kinda stupid service is this?

ok, the thing in UK is that if youre a student, all medical expenses will be covered by the government kinda thing, those like you go like to the normal clinics and all, the meds and stuffs are all free..

but right, to fucking see a doctor you have to fucking make appointment...

so my poor friend went and fucking make appointment and the fucking nurse/receptionist said that he will only get to meet the doctor next monday and i was like: wtf!!!!!!!!!!

this is just too terrible, by the time my kawan made it to the appointment the eye either sudah recover or the eye sudah blind i tell you...

its seriously that bodoh.....

if you want fast there are always private clinics but hehe... not cheap i tell you..

now to think of it thats why sometimes patients rather treat themselves at home rather than going to the doctors..

its just too ridiculous...


whatever la..

hopefully my kawan the mata should be alright la..

anyway i found this picture somewhere online and i would like to dedicate it to my friend, NINJA! :) hihi...

the teacher is also quite boomz one to think of it!! sporting sial!!


Wednesday, January 25, 2012

so this new groupmate friend of mine had something going on with his eye and coincidentally we just finished our in depth session on STDs that can also occur in the eye and he was super worried..

so after our lecture he asked whether can i go with him to see the GP, mind you everyone of us are registered with a GP and his was like 30 mins walk from home..

that time i was already at home wanting to start cooking for lunch then he called...

i wanted to like go with him maybe after i have my lunch but i think he is kinda paranoid...


if i were him i also will be paranoid la...

too much information sometimes is also not a good thing... we tend to worry too much...

i put down what i was doing, changed and then went out without thinking...

but i think i did the right thing la..

i mean if i was him i would be afraid too and if there is someone there for me my worries would be greatly be shifted away...

and that sorta reminded me of when my bestie came and teman me to go for my STD checkup when we were still in Malaysia..

oh well.. i miss him alot.. haha..

and Im kinda happy that i could be there for my new friend here..

haha.. sorta like helping others like how you wanna be helped kinda thing...

but for now i better go cook something to eat!! super hungry!! like totally.. its like 4pm now and i just had snickers on the go just now! lolllll...

muacks you guys!!


p.s. if it makes you feel better, do it, no matter what it is.. at least you wont regret after that! :)

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

personal preference :)

its really quite easy to spot a blogger when you added a facebook profile of some closeted blogger who is using a fake identity and all he adds is gay friends/blogger then when during some festival he tags everyone in his friends list in some wishing card thing and you're in it and everyone will be like trying to figure each other out or maybe just me la...

well its your own call when you decided to accept friend request or request at the first place..


thats not the main point..

so this afternoon there was this one blogger that sent me a facebook message and he was like:

i assume that you are tuls.. or something like that then it boils down to how he found out from another blogger's profile that i add..

i know..

the guy is such a stalker...(*stare at you know yourself best* hehehe)

like totally!!

then nevermind..

we talk about the most randomest(wtf got such word arr?) stuffs and all and at one occasion he said that he used to hate my blog and i was like: WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!!?

but he said he forgotten the reason...

and i was like: ok, as long as now you suka cukup!!!!!!!! the rest just whatever!! lollll

but seriously why would someone hate such an angelic innocent funny cute tall hot blogger like me?!????? *blink eye non stop trying to fat hao*


please vomit...


personal preference i guess?!?!

or was it last time my blog super boring?!?!?

or is it because my blog last time too slutty!!?!?!?


LIKE I CARE!!!!!!!!!!!! 


chinese new year is such a bitch i had a 9 - 5 uni session but i skipped the whole day!! yay...!!!!

reason being: its CNY and i deserve a holiday!!

and i really slept till like 2pm cos the night before/ the morning before i slept at 4 or was it 5 or something la... hahahaah...

im gonna add oil into my next few assignments and start preparing for finals!!! i know its still like 4 months to go but must start to kiasu already...

new year new spirit liao!!


Monday, January 23, 2012

water dragon come my way!!!

there are 12 different creatures in the chinese calendar.. namely SU NIU HU TU LONG SHE MA YANG HOU JI GOU ZU.. thats how the chinese hafal it.. which are RAT COW TIGER RABBIT DRAGON SNAKE HORSE GOAT MONKEY COCK BITCH PIG..

and each creature has five of its kind, WATER FIRE EARTH METAL WIND if im not mistaken... see even creature also wanna element element all, so avatar kinda shit..

so anyway...

this year is said to be the WATER DRAGON year..

if direct translation from the TULSIONARY, WATER DRAGON = DIARRHEA which is not a pleasant and desirable thing so i dowana interpret it that way...

erm.. lemme see..


k la...

May the Water Dragon year give me WET WET DOWN THERE BY A DRAGON can? lolllllllllllll!!!


anyway i would like to take this opportunity to wish all chinese around the world a happy healthy prosperous new year!! if you're a bit fair and perasan then its also dedicated to you la ok.. if youre dark then i cant help you la but some chinese are super dark but... erm.. anyway...

may all of you wet wet down there by big dragons ok..

and lastly before going... this is for you!! the boomziest thing ive ever seen!!

prease interpret it sankyou!! :)


ps: if you get it then you are boomz!!
for those who dont get it, it means "long ma jing shen" = dragon horse "jing shen".. there is no such english word for jing shen.. jing shen = feeling fresh, awake?, good libido kinda shit?!!?

but in this context, its wishing all of you good health and vitality i guess, so yea!! muacks you guys!! :)

Sunday, January 22, 2012

reunion dinner?

ccb i tell you, so yesterday we went to the market to get some fresh seafood for our reunion steamboat and so this was what happen at the fishmonger's place..

ccb fucking pissed!!

wah.... *count* ............ok we want 6 of this *pointing towards the fish*, 3 kilos of this *pointing towards the crab*, 1 kilo of this *pointing towards prawn*...

alright... *pack pack pack*

*looking at the scallops* hm... *thinking to myself: wah not cheap eh this scallop...* ok, can we have 15 of this...


....are you rich..?

wah i damn beh song him lo i tell you after he say that to me... i just smile and look at him... then he continue packing...

wah seh i tell you i was gonna explode liao that time..

look down on us asians think we cannot afford to buy seafood is it?!?!?!


fucker now i regretted leh cheebye i should have said: eh, i wanted 50, did it say 15?



but at last we bought altogether 40 pounds of fresh seafood for steamboat... thats like damn awesome lot and me favourite crab is so omgosh i cant waittttttttttttt!! hahahaha...

oh well... fuck it...

nothings gonna spoil my mood you racist bitch!!!!

this song me likey!! :) im gonna skype my grandparents and ask for angpau!! lollllll

happy reunion dinner everyone!!!


Saturday, January 21, 2012

two days to chinese new year..

everytime this year, my family would be back in Johor already..

thats the dads hometown by the way, both my grandparents are still alive.. whereas my mum's which is in Ipoh, i think i only went back like once in my life for CNY, mainly because the ang paus are usually like 10 times lesser and secondly both my mum's parents are not around anymore so the more reason to see my living grandparents while they are still alive..

i always got the thought that they might go anytime so before i left to come here i go back like every month to see them and my didi..


after getting my driving license i was like the designated driver to wherever my family wants to go like Mr Drebar like that but i aint complaining.. hahah.. i dont mind driving de as long ada orang cakap to me.. 3 hours journey sometimes damn boring one and sometimes i have to sing to keep myself awake.. there was once i was so tired i slap myself every minute to make me awake which was hillarious now to think of it.. passerby might think that im a psycho lolllllllll


but this time around.. all im doing is just sitting around, shopping for "reunion dinner"'s lauk and thats it..

its not sad, its just different..


gonna do steamboat for reunion dinner and so the preparation starts!!

today also gonna clean my whole room(lol that means all the while not clean? lollll)..

my room needs a lil life in it.. feel like its too dull.. haha..

so for once no mandarin orange, no ang pau, no long distance driving..

and to think of it two years ago i even drove for an hour off my grandparents place to meet bubu.. haha.. something like bai nian kinda thing during CNY.. his whole family would bring me go makan makan, then come back play mahjong, chat abit and at night i would drive back.. :) to think of it, its like wow.. its been two years.. if bubu and i were still together, it would have been our cotton anniversary two weeks ago..


i still do miss him..

dont think i will be able not to.. :)

alright!! can wait for tomorrow's so called reunion dinner and of course my virtual skype celebration with my family as well! haha..


Friday, January 20, 2012

the flirting game...

ok la.. this time around will do a review on The Rainbow In Me boy's No You Didn't!

"So you got to know a guy, and you guys chatted for quite sometime.

It's like everyday.

Dusk till dawn, whenever there's nothing to do, you all will begin to text each other. Replies might be slow, you got anxious. Sometimes it's just a hour-to-hour updates, I am missing you and what you had for lunch/dinner.

Awww...so sweet.

Are you giving your love away too fast ?

2 weeks went on.

Of course in between, there were flirtatious text messages being thrown into the get-to-know-you session. It's like sex, without physical contact. You got all hyped up and erotic.

Suddenly, he sent over his naked picture.

To be precise, picture focusing at his tool.

Oh my, what to do, how to react ? We haven't even go out on a date.

Is he in just for sex, or in for real ?"
im really not a good analyzer..

i suck at all this shit but here is giving a shot at it see ngam or not.. so there are a few persoalans in this case..

1. If he is in just for sex, he could have just ask you for it, lead a short talk and then sent his dick to you on the first day itself, why after 2 3 weeks?

2. The whole get-to-know-you period lasted for about 2 3 weeks.. not bad wert.. doesnt seem like a fling thing.. of course la to what extend we tak tau la.. if he wanna bed you why wanna try to know you?

3. But the dick pic came up in the end, so does it mean that all the get-to-know-period is just to slightly get the other party's attention and focus thinking that he might be the one so that he could fling with him easier?

4. Or is the dick pic just in for a tease like normal couples do? so its harmless?

What would you do if you were him?

There will definitely be "attraction at first sight" one surely.. (someone said this before i forgotten who.. shit.. if youre the one please tell me then i will give you credit, muacks)...

the superficial photoshopped picture on facebook/grindr/axcest etc wah that one surely see liao the air liur 3 feet i tell you.. dono the pic was how many years ago one ada yang.. siao..

but we are humans, will tend to hook on to things that are pleasant to the eye(individual taste)..

so you start la to get interested at that person.. slowly get to know him.. cos belum meet ma so the expectation is there!! the ooomph is there!! everything about the guy you saw online/onphone whatever is perfect!!

but sometimes, after the first meet you will never see him again..

if lucky then... hehe.. the rest is history la...

i think usually these kinda thing cannot guess wan lor..

CX arr..

my humble opinion hor, is that you go out for a date la.. since youre single and available and nothing to lose.. just continue nia.. no harm doing.. if dont try you wont know also..

the choice of slutting after thinking that he might not be the one is up to you la.. that one personal preference and judgement.. but also vice versa la.. he might not want to fling you.. lol..

mm.. ok la..

finish analysis, data interpretation and discussion..

no SPSS thanks...


Thursday, January 19, 2012

what do you play when youre younger?!?!

i use younger.. its not specific like when youre in kindergarten or primary school..

its the time frame when you feel that youre younger.. haha..

so yea, yesterday's post on Dogs, there was a comment talking about games influencing my dreams..


to think of it..

i dont play games anymore, the last time i played was like 10 years back, it was some counter strike thing and thats all.. was quite pro in it but thats another thing..


i think everyone grew up differently..

when i was younger i dont indulge in sweets so i never visited a dentist in my life for the past 22 years.. (im just making an assumption sweet = bad for gigi)..

i never had toys..

i think i had a bicycle.. and thats what i do when i was free.. just ride it around the neighbourhood, go pasar malam with it..

other than that i will just stick to the TV and thats it..

kinda simple now that i think of it... haha..

during secondary school i would go to the cyber cafe play my counterstrike thing.. then will go read gay blogs.. haha.. remember i was 15 when i first got contact with the gay blog world.. just browsing thru posts by strictlygay and pluboy.. haha.. never thought that i will be writing one myself one day.. :)

high school was different.. i started to venture out and fulfill the missing parts, the curiosity i had for the gay world and encounter glory holes and got addicted to it..

after SPM was a traumatizing time for me as i thought i would die of some STDs kinda thing.. haha.. nights i would think of what will i do if i really got it and a list was made : STUFFS TO DO BEFORE I DIE...

then later only did i went for checkups and stuffs and find that im alright..

but it was so addictive i went and fling around the next best spot i found, the gym.. see.. never learn from experience.. hahahaah oh well.. then the whole scary traumatizing experience repeat itself.. lol..


well thats basically it..

my younger-hood is kinda different in a way and i dont blame it making me what i am today.. its just different.. well many may find it similar to them and many may not..

its different for everybody i guess..

but im grateful that in each and every level there were friends, good friends that was there along the way supporting and encouraging and what not.. haha..


and bubu too.. hm.. i miss him :)

haha.. anyway...
remember what did you do to pass time when youre younger??!


i sing when i was very young so yea.. its my favourite pastime! :)

Wednesday, January 18, 2012


last night i had a nightmare...

i was in a carpark with my junior high best friend while holding a gun when all of a sudden a dog appeared..

i dont remember what size shape or colour but i use the gun and fire at it..

after that a whole kampung of dogs came running at us..

we ran for our lives and the dogs caught up with my friends and they were furiously biting him and he shout out to me to help and i fire a shot at one of the dogs then...

i woke up..

feeling uneasy and everything..


why why why?!?!!

stupid dream..

i think i love dogs if they are not wild and stuffs and in the UK there are no wild dogs anywhere at all.. just missing ones..

so these kinda scenario will never happen here...

but the thing is..

dogs are still animal...

no matter how much you love them or how much they love you, you will never ever understand how they will because we cant communicate...

i have a friend who has a phobia of dogs saying: I dont get it when they walk up to me and start jumping around, i freak OUT!!

i was like: WTF and gave it a good laugh but the thing is he is traumatized when there are dogs around him.. thats a rare sight.. first encounter of dogophobia... lol


no relation of the dream or my friend..

just thought of cakap-ing..

so, adakah anda takut pada Anjing!?!?!


Tuesday, January 17, 2012

asshole longgar!??!?

a crazy commenter asked me this:

i forgot to ask u ....i wanted to ask , since last time u kata u have had sex with lebih kurang 100 men ....is it true that the anus will no longer be tight?, does it mean that it will be difficult to retain berak , and it will just flow out ? just wanted to ask that , coz a doctor once told me that guys who have anal a lot , will lose their tightness..

firstly to clarify, i dont think i said i had sex with 100 men.. im not sure about the figure la.. just dont ask that.. lol...

and about the tightness... hm.. i can say that mine is still amatla tight..

just imagine your asshole is a ring of muscles that contracts and relaxes!! it shuts tight when there is shit in it.. thats why when you fart when there is shit there wont be any sound and its deadly whereas when there is no shit in it it will relax and the wind can just BOOOOT out from your "sifat"!!

so.. back to the tightness... it depends on the dick size la!!!

everytime you have sex thousands of cells die... due to friction, slamming, rimming, thrusting, toying etc...

you abuse more, your cells die more lor..

but the miracle thing is that our skin cells regenerate very fast lor to compensate the loss..

anyway... *one big round*...

the point is..

you are literally FUCKED by your own SHIT everyday...

so imagine your SHIT size.. if your dick size is lebih kurang your normal shit size then i dont think your hole will be longgar that fast la...

unless your dick is like my favourite ANTONIO BIAGGI!!

*picture removed - i dowana have that user content pop out thing.. lol*

omgosh... if im his bf and i have sex with him everyday within one year i will have anus prolapse!!

ive never heard of any gay men having that problem and actually its quite rare i think for it to just drop out like that..

the same goes to the vagina..

as long as your muscle is doing its job youre fine...

by the time that happens i think most of us also die liao... or maybe by then sex isnt that important anymore..

lets say 70? you prolly wanna go travelling or just join some social support group and end your life after that...


dont worry about it!!

go and have it.. enjoy sex!! but make sure you do it with your loved ones* terms and conditions apply!

*doesnt apply to SLUTS


Monday, January 16, 2012

chinese superheroes are dirty people...

i should do an extensive search on this but nah.. i saw something quite similar on kan-kan's post earlier so i thought of writing it down..

so recently i was like burning the midnight shit to do my assignments and stuffs and i was like OK, this is too much, i need a break..

so i make a cup of old town 3 in one white coffee with hazelnut, took my scottish all butter shortbread, stream stormriders (fong wan in kantonese) and watch it all over again..

and thats when i realize something..

they never wash their hair at all in the movie..

as though like 10 years tak pernah wash like that..

and seriously they can go do commercial for gatsby and everything else..

when the heroine is half dying and the hero go and mendukung her in the arms while flying somewhere to get help, i think the girl can smell the hair and just die there instead..

no need to help already..

the ekin cheng the hair like so dry and split ends all over.. like the broom stick like that you know..

so teruk...

and that is how they portray chinese superheroes in the past... hahahahah.. dirty hair flying guy with powers that can shoot out from the hand..

but i still like my aaron kwok!!

so hot one!!



Sunday, January 15, 2012

double identity...

well i think the title says it all..

like me when im tuls, i can be who i wanna be write what i wanna write and dont care about the consequences.. yea i receive hate mails and what not but so what?!?!? it doesnt affect my real life as long as the two doesnt collide.. when im the real me, im more reserved, more controlled, more straight?!?!? lol!!!!!!! nah......... . Unlesss im around my close friends then im all kegilaan terkeluar.. if not im just normal i guess..

most of the bloggers here live a double life.. who doesnt?!?! even if youre not a blogger, you tend to have two different sides of you..

if youre gay, you tend to act differently with the gay crowd and the straight crowd..

if youre normal, you will tend to act differently when youre with your friends and when youre with your bf/gf whateverF.. ok.. erm... okok that makes gays have triple identity then(LOLLLL)..

for eg.. a guy can be oh so tough and hot and sexy but when he is with his gf he loses all of it and become a puny soft loser... haha.. ive seen it myself.. its super LOL..


the thing is its OK to have 2 different you..

i mean as long as you know your boudaries and know what youre doing and dont get caught like jekyll and hyde and explode in the end or something..


so ancients ago i met this so called straight blogger online who i then somehow linked him to his gay blog kinda thing(seriously dont ask me who.. hush hush).. to cut things short, he freaked out, blocked me, and destroyed all evidence that i saw.. thing is he is not very good in hiding his identity in the first place..

but well, you dont have to block me right??!?! like its not like im gonna tell the whole world OH, HE IS GAYYYYYYYYYYYYY!! like... he is gay? so what??!

but anyway.. whats done is done.. i dont really care much.. once awhile i will pop into his straight world blog and see what he is doing..


whatever la..

but its rather awkward after that... the blogs that he frequents, the ones that he comments, i wont really comment in them.. the sight of his name is like a repellent to me.. i just wanna like click close tab kinda thing.. whenever he is there, i wont be and whenever im there, i dont think he will be there kinda thing..

well im not sure whether he knows that im gay or not, but would it make a difference if he were to know!?!?


i wonder...


if you plan to come out, start a blog, and write stuffs.. just be prepared to be talked about, to be shown to others eg FB profiles, to be badmouthed.. blah blah blah..

if youre not ready to handle those kinda stress then stay at home and dont appear..

like seriously..

you might know who im talking about, you might not know.. you might think its you.. but the person im writing about, i dont think he reads my blog anyway..

whatever it is, youre not alone.. and chill la.. im harmless :)

the fact that im writing this thing out is that i dont know what is he thinking... i need closure... he just shut me off just like that and im out of the picture without knowing the reason behind it...

is he afraid??!?! was he shocked??!? confused??!?! closeted!?! hm....



Saturday, January 14, 2012


not tear..


no more tears ok...

im shedding skin!! yup!!

like after sunburn and stuffs but this is just the normal shedding by a human body thing..

in malaysia i think i experience it like a few times a year but by right its like every entah brapa minggu once but in the UK the effect of the peeling is enhanced by 100 percent!!

like seriously especially my back i tell you oh my goodness its so dry and itchy and omgosh its so flakyyyyyyyyyyy!!!

and my murai mulut, the sides there and the nose is like 5 cent coin peeling off! hahahaha..

so bodoh right i know..

and so ngam my body rejects body butter, its like so powerful cos after using it for a night the next morning i bled.. not cos of the butter but cos of my own scratching.. its too oily le ba... so now im resorting only to lotion and vaseline is such a darling!! its cheap and gooods so tak yah kisah just guna banyaks..


on another note a friend asked me this: why is it so hard to get a guy a gift?!!

and i was like: errr.. true also la, but if its me, i will never ever mind to have more than one bottle of perfume!! *hinting her*

then she was like ooooo...

but seriously very difficult to get guys present meh?!?!? just go and see whats nice then buy then give then can liao la.. as long as it is sincere kan?!?!?!


Thursday, January 12, 2012

junk mail reply!! :)

i deleted this junk mail i think for like 3 times liao but it kept coming so this is like my reply to Her!! lol..

Hello happy new year !
How are you doing today i,hope every thing is fine,? if so thanks be to God almighty who made it so.
My name is Happiness i am a girl. I saw your email address in a forwarded page so I decided to extend my greetings to you.
Right now I can’t really say what prompted my drive to write you, but I do have the mind that you could be a nice person.
I have an interest to meet people from out side my continent to be friends. It is my Believe that there are nice people out there who can appreciate the value of friendship,.so i will like you to mail me back to my email address so that i will give you my pictures,have a nice day and remain Blessed.

Hi Happiness,
I am fine, you? Bless you so much. My name is Tuls and i am gay. Thanks for your mail anyway cos if you have read my blog you wont be writing to me. Seriously!
I know i could be a nice person but i know no shit about you cos your name is a noun, abstract noun to be exact. ok la be fair my name tuls is a jargon shit as well la fine..
Your continent? Happiness, where are you from? Land of emotions? nah give you this emoticon la happiness  :)
you go find some Sorrow or some Depress and give them your pic so that they can be Happy, as far as i know Tuls need Sex to be happy so pictures of Happiness is not necessary at the moment.


Wednesday, January 11, 2012

why got no award for gay blogs one!!???

really what..

they have the nuffnang thing la, then music got music awards la, tv la, film la...

we also create one la..

and the categories will be like..


1. Most followers in a blog award - eric lor...
2. Most post in a blog award - eric lor...
3. Most drooling pictures in a blog award - simon lor..
4. Most dramatic blog award - i claim this.. lol
5. Most comment in a blog post award - i claim this again.. lol
6. Most mysterious blogger award - lil dove la.. he WAS mysterious.. no one knows how he look like or some shit.. but now even mysterious cos dono where he went liao.. Lil dove, you there?!?!?! knock knock!!
7. Blog of the year award - i shamelessly ambik.. *raise eyebrows twice*
8. Blogpost of the year award - this one... cannot decide...
9. Power couple of the year award - give to Jason and Vincent la, they work very hard for it liao.. lol..
10. Blog that you wont read award - shall not name it..
11. Best photography in a blog award - malimo :)
12. Most avid commenter award - nah ooi2009 for you la happy!?!?
13. Most annoying commenter award - this one also for you you unracist bitch..
14. Blogger(gay) of the year award - i will shamelessly claim this again.. will even fight for it.. lol
15. Blogger(bi) of the year award - whoever wants it take it ... i dont approve this award.. lollllll
16. Favourite new blogger of the year award - erm.. erm.. erm.. since im still new i take also la.. *shamelessly*
17. OMG that blog is still alive award - hahahahahah... *secret*
18. Lifetime achievement blog award - give to eric :)
19. Blogger that you most want to meet award - of course me la.. who else.. *look into mirror and nod with confident, with clenched fist in front of face doing the "yeh" post while lowering and lifting the fist*

i know, thats so gay... lol



ok i felt a few slaps!!


but seriously!!?!?

no TONY, no AMA, no Grammys?!?!

maybe i should just start one TULS AWARD kinda thing huh?!!?!

and the category will be like

  1. blogger that you want to sleep with most - ****
  2. blogger that you think is too hot - ****
  3. sluttiest blogger - ****
  4. toppest blogger - ****
  5. bottomest blogger - ******
  6. trans blogger - lol
  7. blogger with biggest dick - ****
  8. hairy dilf blogger - *******
  9. bearest blogger - *******
  10. twinkiest blogger - ****
  11. blogger that improves the most in terms of body size and shape..!?!?!? - ****


siao kia...

thats what happen when youre too sleepy.. think of all the nonsense...


if want to do also i think eric should do it, cos his viewers are like the most.. and like he has a strong fan/follower base.. should have lots of blogs that wants to take part kan?!?!?! *raise hand : me me me me*


Tuesday, January 10, 2012

can you benci someone first time seeing them!?!

ok.. how do you benci someone you dont even know??!!

i can say that im quite surface oriented when benci-ing someone..

like lets say a blogger commented on some other blogs that i find it offensive then that commentor is in my black list like forever...

or lets say if that person is bi... im quite against bi people who have sex with men but in relationships with girls.. like seriously.. choose a side.. i know a few who are reading.. yes... to you la... hahaha... i will pull you to my side dont worry...

am i shallow!??! (like i care)



first impression tells everything.. i might be wrong, that person might be a good person to the max but if that instance of approach with me is bad he is gone... lol...

i know..

its very... erm... yea...

i dont know.. i just cannot tahan...


and it takes time for me to remove that person from the black list unless... erm... chances are like 0.009%...

i can act totally fake and normal in front of that person(mentah mentah ingat actor yang bagus) but deep down... dont make me vomit... *rolleyes*.. like the housemates i wrote about yesterday.. but thats after living with them for 4 months... blah...

do you experience such "phenomenon" ?!?!?!


ps: benci = hate :)

Monday, January 9, 2012

tuls no more good housemate!!

its just so gay to be good you know.. like i sometimes cook for the whole house without asking them to pay me a single penny..

sometimes i make curry, sometimes i make soup..


whenever im going to town i would ask everyone of them whether they need anything from there so i could just buy it on the way...

then that day the ben's and jerry's stuff...


so today i had late lunch was like ate till 3 and then after washing up i went up to my room la do assignments as usual...

downstairs got some commotion but whatever la none of my business..

then later there was a knock on my door.. tuls, can i borrow one of your garlic? oh ok.. take la take...

then 30 mins later i went down and saw them making a pot of bak kut teh and i was like in my heart ok, selfish little bitches..

i went to the kitchen to refill my tumbler and acted surprise like: oh, youre doing bak kut teh! i want i want i want!!

thick-skinned me just said that out of nowhere and they look at each other and... oh.. ok ok.. sure got extra one..

then ok lor.. i just smile and say YAY.. but in my heart i was like fuck you bitches...

so i went up and apparently they ate everything and left whtever they cant finish for me which is a good thing because it was a huge lot...

those bitches dint even boil rice for me...


im just so happy now that i know..

im not even gonna ask how much is my share... im so not gonna pay and act stupid and after this no more mr nice guy.. a walk to town takes 15 mins and to carry groceries and walk 15 mins back makes the distance as though doubled cos sometimes the groceries are bloody heavy..

so yea.. im gonna act all nice and yay so happy and gay in front of them but im not that nice anymore..

call me two face!!

i know i am..



go to hell bitches...

ps bak kut teh = a herbal chinese soup brewed with pork and sometimes mushroom and chinese leaf..

Sunday, January 8, 2012

where is my candle!??!

it was 2 in the afternoon and i was walking back to my rumah from town buying groceries..

buka jer pintu my housemate look at me: no electric la...


so basically we are screwed..

we cant do anything at all..

we called our agent telling him that we received some notice about our bills not paid and everything shit and stuffs ask them to gao dim la cos those are done by them not us..

later that our phones one by one died...

haha... at one time my kawan scream from the toilet.. we all went down and see what happen and apparently the water level rose till nearly overflow out the toilet cos the suction pressure of the shitwaterhole is powered by electricity so basically we cant shit or pee... hahahahaha...

its almost 4 and the sky is turning dark and we are like panicking so ok we said to each other to go to the library to wait la and study there since it opens 24 hours so we packed everything and waited at the living room...

pas tu it was 4 and i baru teringat i got my ben's n jerry's in the freezer.. takut ia tak tahan kepanasan so i said: ok jom makan it la before it melts...( so blonde tak ingat its so cold here it wont melt that fast )

so we had ben's and jerrys in the almost dark living room.. haha.. it was kinda awesome la dono macam exciting.. its only like 2.20 here so = RM11 unlike the ones in msia that cost rm30.. cibai.. 2 tubs habis in a matter of minutes.. lol..

after finishing the icecream we took our bagasi and off we go to the library..

half way through down the next block we then heard lots of alarms went crazy and thinks its from our street so we ran back to see our living room alight from the outside..


seems like the whole street was out of power not only our rumah but the thing is we dint notice it at all cos usually the ang mohs dont on their lights pun.. lol.. our streets are usually dark all the time so it doesnt make a difference.. haha.. and once power was restored so ngam maybe all the alarms were reseted or some shit la..

so basically candle is needed for emergency when there is no electricity especially in the winter when the sun only is there for one third of the day...


Saturday, January 7, 2012


ok lor so school is like seriously starting soon again..

everyone else has got break till like end of January but mine starts next week..




can it not so cepats arr?!!??

im so not ready to start school again..

and hopefully snow dont come la..

winter without snow is good enough at least no need to worry tak leh keluar gi class and wont tersleep cos too cold.. lol..

anyway i miss the london groupie to the max laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...

i wonder bile kita akan bertemu lagi like this... :)

next time if got chance in Malaysia pun boleh buat macam ini!! hihihahahoho...

p.s. for those who tak kenal me, can guess mana i tak?!?!?! lollllllll and guess which one im dating now?!?! lolllllllll jk jk

Friday, January 6, 2012

pre-vacation scare..

late post much but anyway...

the day i left for London to meet up with Jason and rest was the day my house got broken into..

it was just a short span of an hour when all of my housemates and i went to the town to get some stuffs and boomz..

we separated in town and they somehow went home first.. while buying some stuffs to eat on the way i got a phone call..

tuls, our house.. break in...

my heart sunk..

the excitement of winter vacation just vanished at that instant..

i fast paced home..

once reach the door i saw police patrol cars in front..

i open the door to see my housemates crying...

one of them shook her head looking at me..

i dashed up to my room...

it was still locked...

i was still shock that time but yea.. my room was fine...

my friend's passport and stuffs, dslr, lappie and everything else all gone...

the robbers packed everything in pillow cases and went off cos my friend's 2 pillow case were gone from the pillow..

i couldnt stay on long cos my train ride was in a couple of hours time and so i left my house with a sense of shock..

it felt so surreal...

i feel bad for my friends..

after coming back from London everything changed..

we put up extra locks and stuffs..

if i know im gonna leave my room for more than 5 minutes i will lock it eg shower, cooking...

although i know all my housemates for 2 years plus but the house dont seem to be save in our eyes anymore...

we are more observant and paranoid with every little thing that happens around us..

a small squeeeek also we will think 3 think 4...

im moving to another house the next schooling year..

hopefully will find peace in that house la LOL...

but now everything is back to normal la but sometimes i will look out the window and imagine stuffs like: is that person the one? kinda thing.. lol...

but the vacation was a stress free one la..

post-withdrawal still on.. haha..


Thursday, January 5, 2012

cut off all ties...

so yea..

what type of ex are you?!?!

im the type who cant make friends with the ex i think...

at first i thought that i could, even though we separate thru a mutual understanding, no one dumping nobody..

i thought its gonna be like : oh now we are friends, can talk like normal... laalalala..

bukan lor..

dont think i can..

everything he does...

anyone he meets..

anywhere he goes...

if i dapat tau i will feel the tingling uneasy sensation in me..

maybe it will fade with time..

1 year? 2 years?

what if after n-years he end up with someone else?



i better not find out cos i dont think it will do me any good..

so its just best to cut off all communications with him...


i know youre reading this now...


i just need the space i think..

hope that you understand..

im like literally avoiding you now..

i hid your fb updates from my news feeds...


im sorry...

i need this..

maybe for awhile..

but its better la..

at least im not crying anymore.. haha..

boo ya!! :)





Wednesday, January 4, 2012

virgins : keep it dont lelong..

recently ive met a few real life gay virgins and also a few online..

the mentality of most of them are like as though they are sad that they are still virgins...

like wth!!!

if i was a virgin, i would be so proud... *hand gesture: a wave with 5 fingers pointing out*

to all the virgins out there, dont think youre the last and only virgins left in the community!!

think again!!


up to now, 28% of the vote on the poll to the right states that they are virgins.. the percentage might not reflect the real life scenario but it can give a rough estimation that virgins out there are still abundant..

youre not losing out as a virgin...

once you lose it, youre not gonna get it back..

why do you want to lose it so badly?!?!

youve waited lets say 20 years or 30 years, cant you wait a lil longer?

so what if everyone out there is havin sex and youre not?!?!

so what if they brag about their sex life??!! they might just be lying, they might just do it to boast their self esteem..

so what if they slept with millions of men!?!?!

so what?!!?

its not like you cant!!

you can have 1 fling, 2 flings, 10 flings or you can be a total slut but why should you?!?!

after fling-ing, sometimes you will feel that youre dirty la, thinking that you will get some disease la, feeling jealous la, get addicted la.. all the negative stuffs.. and seriously if you dont do it right, what you feel will eventually eat you up and you will be depress after that..

but its not like you cant have sex.. just make sure its the right one...

if you were to be able to have your first with someone you love and so lucky if he is a virgin as well, both of you could just do it without helmet forever as long you stay monogamous..

thats the best thing that could happen to a couple...

thinking of it makes me jealous..


its not like you cant have it with a non virgin.. nothing wrong.. just make sure its with a helmet, you or him.. and then make sure he gets checked like every 6 months or so..

the decision is in your hands..

you decide what you want to do with your life..


Tuesday, January 3, 2012

i snore like a cow...

ok seriously i have no idea i snore so badly..

jason says like as though i was suffocating..


i mean, yea bubu told me that i snore before but i dint know it was that bad until i heard my own snore..

some genius recorded my snore when i was sleeping in London.. hahaha...

now they can use it to blackmail me..

my never so embarrassing side surfaced omgoshhhhhh...

my reputation is gone!!!! (what repu?!! cheh!!)

anyway... im not the only who snored lo ok.. i got ear witnesses..

i dowana be like kenny sia go singapura and correct his nose thing and now he doesnt snore anymore.. lol.. he more towards if-dont-correct-will-die kinda situation, mine minor la i guess..

SO, do you snorE?! did it wake your partner up?! lol :)


Monday, January 2, 2012

100000 unique views...

its another climb up the ladder.. haha..


thanks everyone for the endless support..

x x x x x x x x x x x x 

i thought that it would do me a lil good changing the header and everything..

not to say i dont want bubu anymore in my life..

maybe just not now..


it would be for the best... at least for me..

i need to clear my mind and focus it somewhere else :)

x x x x x x x x x x x x

to the UK bloggers, its nice meeting up with you guys and hopefully see you guys sometime around this year..

to those in Malaysia, youre dearly missed.. haha...

somehow i feel like im kinda cut out from that part.. malaysia seems further and further away.. point of contact reaching zero except me mum..

oh well..

to all readers out there, may 2012 be a boomz year for you guys, stay slutty and be proud of who you are.. you know youre worth it..



i miss you..
ive been bitchy whenever i talk to him either on whatsapp, skype or text..
i can not be myself.., its like i have to put up another strong side of me..
if not.., i dont think i can face him..., i will break down...
but i think i have to move on...
seeing him living his life over the other side of the world..
seeing him doing things and going places.., things that we should have done if we were together..
distance is a bitch.., i hate you..
maybe hating you will makes things much easier...
i find myself annoying..
i cant help it..
i thought i was strong..
but i dont hate you...
are these tears of jealousy?
dowana start the new year with tears..
what a way to start the new year...
i'll be stronger...

thanks for the memories...

Sunday, January 1, 2012