where am i?

i last blogged in August, and before that i did too, inconsistently throughout the year since i came back from abroad.

what happened?

nothing slutty of course.


i was trying to get myself adjusted with everything.

my house no longer belongs to just me and my mum. there are other tenants that are living here now. mum rented practically whatever she could just to get some side income while i was away. it turned out quite well now as it is.

the weather has been a bitch. i always had this eczema thing going on. the heat was always my enemy and would be permanently a problem for me in this country. but of course, it's just heat, there are always alternatives to cool the body down....

trying to get a job then. i still have debts from my schooling days. im really glad that my awesome loaner didn't really rush me to pay him back what i owe. and im really glad that i had finally paid all that Keith had lend me for my tuition fees back in uni where my funds was cut off cos my awesome dad decided to use it for something better than my education. blah.

socially...
i was fresh in the market in Malaysia after 3 years of absence... well i assumed i was fresh.. lol still fabulous plus 10kilos extra! lol... yea i gained it in the first few months i came back. haha. some liked it, some hated it, most of us got used to it. i became plus size. yay. lovely. trying to get back in shape. that's been a problem since rice is my best friend and here in Msia we practically have rice-y meals in every street of the country!


and so i brought jboy to explore marketplace, met SKP over there. such a small world, SKP is very interesting! to those who doesnt know him,  he is loud, but he is kind and has a hot bod. lol promo sial. good bf material! lol.... .....but yea, i felt so out of the game when i was there. 3 years older makes me feel like i lost touch and i lost my game and i feel like i don't fit in the scene anymore.

i slowly gathered my army and got reunited with once upon a time friends and bloggers. the GB gang is now quite awesome in my opinion! the GB gang consist of 5 bloggers from my golden era. We try to meet up and hang out as much as we could. Effort is important in every relationship. You won't get anything out of it if you don't put any effort in maintaining it.

i tried dating, downloaded grindr, tinder, it's just so strange now to think of what i did then.

i met people.

after coming out from four different awesome relationships, i have my expectations. i have my doubts.

lots of instant cross out in guys that i was looking for. some criterias were quite substantial, some were superficial.... ....for example a guy in his 30s but still doesnt own a car nor have a driver's license despite having a decent good paying job; or the guy that doesn't have an air conditioning unit in his 2 room apartment; some are just sexually incompatible; mostly aren't interested in relationships...

then i met.... Carter. :)

it feels like my broken life has fallen into place. everything that i was looking for in a partner, he has it. but everything that i wasnt looking for, he has it too :)

no one is perfect they say.

so for a relationship to work, we try to cherish the other's pros, and of course we need to learn how to adapt to his cons, everything is about balance and compromise.

Carter smokes. I hate guys who smokes. He knows that. Compromise is that he never smoke around me. When he does, he always uses the lighter to compass the direction of the wind and sat at the direction of the flow so that I won't be affected :) also, i think i got addicted to his hands after he has a fag or two. I'm so used to that scent after smoking that if we ever meet and he hasnt smoke, and if i sniff his hands which i always do, my face would change. lol. the WHY-HAVENT-YOU-SMOKE face. lol..

on my end. i fart. i love to fart. i don't know how he compromise it. i just assume he does. lol. im not saying that he should. lol. i don't want him to get used to my fart-ings. he just does. somehow he did. ok i feel like this part of me sucks. but i feel like that is like one of my worst thing about me. obvious ones. maybe my friends doesn't need to know, ok maybe you guys doesnt need to know. but like whatever. im human. i fart. and i love to tell. lol. if you wanna hear it please hang out with me and i shall whisper it to you, lol, more like bombard it at your face.

we officially got together at Langkawi, the honeymoon period started then and i dont think it ended yet.

Carter wants it to be different this time. It is really different for me as he works abroad. It seems like long distance relationship all over again but we both put in effort to not make it feel like it.

he would travel to meet me as often as he could, once or twice a month, some short trips, some long ones..

we would go to places that we've not been, new places, new memories for the both of us... we travel almost every month to somewhere new.. it's something i don't see myself doing if it wasnt for him.. living life to the fullest..

i love it when we did a road trip from KL to Ipoh and then Penang and to Perlis then cross the border over to Hatyai, drive all the way up to Songkhla and then up north to Samui island then cross over to the west to Krabi and extend to Phuket then back to KL passing through Trang :) it was the best time of my life so far. My tummy suffered from severe withdrawal from all those awesome Thai food after that. haha... but it was a helluva journey...

so here i am.. still juggling with my 9-6 job.. and also with my precious Carter... my mum... and my friends...

i was so occupied with living that my priorities shifted..

it was a good change for me..

it is really nice to read back old entries and that kinda inspired me to write back again.. and also because a certain few people did really want me to do so... but nobody can force someone to write.. haha..

but yea...

so... here i am..

new entries... new memories...

axe oh axe oh
tuls